Archive for February, 2010
The Equation of My Saturday
I woke up this morning and had this equation in my mind. You know the feeling when you’re half-asleep and every idea seems brilliant because the logical half of your brain is asleep? That’s how the equation below happened. It basically sums up a strange coincidence that happened last night and how I tried to make sense of it.. Well, sort of.
Don’t try to solve the equation – it’s mathematically incorrect. It seemed to make sense in bed, but not so much anymore. It’s more of a code. That part makes sense, but good luck trying to crack it. 
Catastrophobia.
About a month and a half after Haiti’s devastating earthquake, Chile was hit by an 8.8 magnitude earthquake. Is the earth trying to tell us something? 2010 is starting off with tremendous disasters and we’re only into the second month. With the impending prospect of war between Israel and Lebanon, I’m feeling anxious, depressed, worried, numb and helpless- all at once 
I’m listening to “Stranded” (the song written for Haiti aid by Jay-z, Bono, Rhianna and The Edge) and feel inclined to do something to help others.. and now there’s Chile with their own catastrophe. What can I do? How can I help beside sending over money?
Utter helplessness and a silent fear that’s slowly consuming me.
Playfulness in Relationships
Photograph by Christopher Wilson
A month into my dating sabbatical and I’m already starting to realize a few things. One of my best friends is betting me I won’t last, so if I do, I’m entitled to a professional massage (I have my eye on the Elixir Spa hehe) – but there was a catch: the sabbatical will last until April instead of March to make it more of a challenge.
The sabbatical is getting harder each week. It’s making me question what I want in my next relationship while also analyzing my former relationships. Whenever I get tempted or start to feel something for someone these days, I need to remind myself of the sabbatical. In that way it’s helping me control not getting overly-infatuated too soon while also figuring out if I can see myself actually dating that person. That’s the easy, healthy part. The not-so-easy part is when you feel a strong chemistry with someone and just want to go for it.
Some of the people I’ve spoken to about the sabbatical have asked: What if you meet the right person? Are you just gonna tell them to wait until April? I don’t have the answers to that yet and it has been in the back of my mind. My comfort lies in spending more time with anyone I may be interested in now before it gets to that point. Will he wait? Maybe, maybe not. And maybe then I’ll know if he’s worth it or not. It’s so very complicated and involves a lot of thinking where feelings are much easier to deal with. The sabbatical has made me much more objective. Is that how men approach relationships?
I’ve realized (and girls back me up here) is that the dating game is really fun! I’m not talking games as in messing with the guy’s head or acting like a bitch one day/not leaving his side the other, but more the playful way you get around someone you’re attracted to. Playing/goofing around is the key to a happy relationship. No matter how old we are! I can get very silly at times and love, love, love when the guy can play along. It’s also very exciting when things are still unknown. You’re still discovering that other person and what makes them tick. The mystery, intrigue and all that good stuff.
One month almost down. Two more to go.
Sigh.
Getting Straight to the Point
A friend recently posted a link to how popular women’s magazines would look if men wrote them. Hilarious!
Here’s a preview of Vogue’s:
Click here to see more!
Article credits: Cool Material
Original article: http://coolmaterial.com/roundup/if-men-wrote-womens-magazines/
The One That Got Away
Last night I was out with friends and an interesting topic came up. It got me thinking all the drive home.
Do each of us hold one person in our hearts as “the one that got away”? It might have been our first love, a relationship that had to end for reasons we had no control over, or maybe even someone who broke our hearts.
As I’m on my dating sabbatical, this topic got me reflecting on my past “loves”. For a long time, that “one” was my first boyfriend back when I was in college. We stayed in touch after our break-up and it kept me wondering, what if? That dangerous “what if” had negative effects on the relationships I was pursuing after him. It took a while to realize what my subconscious was doing.
It was only in moving back to Lebanon that I spent a bit more time with him and things became really clear. We’d both changed a lot in the three years since our break-up. I finally quieted that “what if” and believed for certain that that chapter in my life was over. He was meant for me back when I was a much younger, much different person.
Holding on to what we were did no one any good and there was no way we’d ever be able to have the same connection again. I have no regrets about our past and hold what we shared dear, but curiosity has a funny way of having to find answers.
I no longer have a “one that got away” and it’s only one foot in front of the other moving forward..
