Lorena's Epiphany

Surviving the Return

February 2, 2010 at 3:02 pm Leave a comment

With one of my friends recently making the big move back to Beirut, I couldn’t help remember my own experiences adjusting. The worst of it were the first three months. Homesickness for the US, mixed with trying to adjust to a new lifestyle and not knowing my next steps took their toll. It was not pretty.

I finally feel adjusted and happy to be home.. Seven months later. Funny, my mom actually told me all along, it takes six months to adjust to any place. And she was right! How do they always know these things, these moms of ours?

A few tips from my own experience:

1- Take your time. Culture-shock will quickly hit you, no matter how Lebanese you are. Observe and stay true to yourself (and who you’ve become).

2- Keep busy. Join clubs, do activities and pursue your own interests while you do the job hunt. This particularly helped me to meet some interesting people. We all know how much harder it is to make friends once we enter the workforce. The friends you left behind will still receive you with open arms, but meeting others who’ve also lived abroad and share your new interests will keep you grounded.

3- Draw the line with the family. They need to know that yes, although you are still living under their roof, you’ve changed. Privacy is sacred and you need that freedom you’ve come accustomed to. My parents now only call in once or twice a day. No more hunting down my ever move like college days. Phew!

4- Lebanon’s changed. It’s quickly improving. Some things may never change (traffic, chaos, snobbery, electricity cuts, slow internet, etc) but the social dynamic has. Suddenly Lebanon is shrouded in young adults who’ve made the move back home too and creating their own niches (musical, artistic, recreational, etc). They’re everywhere. I’ve already run into quite a few back from Boston too.

5- Bitch, whine and let it out. Hey, it’s therapy. You’ll soon stop noticing the things that bothered you at first.

6- Plan your next travels. That helps me tons. It gives me a sense of freedom and vision for the future. I planned an impromptu trip to Dubai for one of these reasons.

7- Don’t feel like a failure for returning. This might not be the case for you, but if it does feel like you could’ve done more to stay in the US, Europe or wherever – LET IT GO. Things happen for a reason and make the most of how things turned out.

8- Keep in touch with your friends. Lots of people get caught up with where they are now that they slowly lose ties with their friends abroad. Making even the smallest effort makes a big difference. God bless Facebook.

9- Compare as little as possible. As long as you accept that this is Lebanon, you’ll begin to find little things to love about it. For me, one of these things was my family. I love spending time with my mom and little sister. I didn’t realize how much I’d been missing out on until I came back. And although the US has a lot to offer, it’s honestly not the best place to be right now. The economy sucks, unemployment is still growing and there is still a lot of ignorance. And high taxes! That’s one less thing to suffer here.

10- Last of all: Welcome home! You’ll survive.. Trust me

Entry filed under: Floating. Tags: abroad, adjusting, friends, Lebanon, missing, moving back home, travelling.